Jeremiah 29:11. Such a great verse to read out of context.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

Sometimes we forget to read the surrounding circumstances that go along with our favourite verses. This has to be one of the most over looked chapter.

You see God was giving this promise to His people. But the promise was given to them while they were living in a foreign land, under a ruler that was not their own. They had been exiled from their land. God tells them in chapter 29 to not dwindle and let their lives slip by because they were in a place they did not want to be. Instead he tells them to plant, to build, to marry, to bear children.

Jeremiah‬ ‭29:5-7‬ ‭NLT
““Build homes, and plan to stay. Plant gardens, and eat the food they produce. Marry and have children. Then find spouses for them so that you may have many grandchildren. Multiply! Do not dwindle away! And work for the peace and prosperity of the city where I sent you into exile. Pray to the LORD for it, for its welfare will determine your welfare.””
‭
To get on with life. That He will rescue them at the right time (70 years later).

Jeremiah‬ ‭29:10
“This is what the LORD says: “You will be in Babylon for seventy years. But then I will come and do for you all the good things I have promised, and I will bring you home again.”

There are times in our lives where we quote verse 11, and wonder why God is not doing as we want and wish. Why the plans do not seem good or what we want. But we need to remember to make the best of the situations we are in. To do good where we are. And when the time is right and the plans that God has for us seem to unfold, all of our past circumstances can start to fill in this puzzle called life. And we can see that all along God had a plan. He had reasons for things. He is able to use the events in our lives that sin tainted to give new life to us and to others. We are able to see that He took us down certain paths, and placed various events in our timeline for a reason. And then

Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11, 13-14‬ ‭NLT
“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,” says the LORD. “I will end your captivity and restore your fortunes. I will gather you out of the nations where I sent you and will bring you home again to your own land.””
‬‬
‭‭God has got this! Don’t fear the process and your current place. He is always in control, so “If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,” says the LORD.”

Hey remember that time you were not a perfect parent? Or that time you were not even a parent?

No? Not ringing a bell?

Turns out we can’t all be awesome like you and watch our kids 100% of the time. The fact that you don’t stop watching your kid for even a second is amazing. It’s incredible that your kids are so perfectly behaved and never cause any problems or get into any trouble. Your paradise life must be great.

And not only do you get to have perfect kids who always obey and never cause trouble but that also means you get to judge the rest of us for apparently sucking at this parenting gig. Every time a news article talks about a tragic event involving a child you get to mount your high horse and stomp all over the parents.

You get to tell them that they don’t deserve their kids. That they obviously were not being a good parent and that their child must be all sorts of wild.

Guess what! You have either gotten really lucky so far in your parenting journey, or have no kids yet. Because accidents happen. Kids let go of hands and are gone in a split second, kids slip out of harnesses (which you judged us for), and kids get snatched away in a split second by alligators.

Do you know how fast kids can run into traffic? Speeding bullet fast. That’s how fast.

Do you know how short kids are and how easy it is to misplace them in a crowd? Because they are short and crowds are tall.

Maybe your kids are not curious and maybe your kids brains have developed all the proper safety parts. But for the rest of the kid population out there you need to realize that kids are curious and kids have under developed brains that don’t have all the safety nets in place. Kids don’t understand that there is a drop off after those bushes, kids don’t understand that there is a man eating beast lurking, and kids don’t understand how fast a car can hit them.

And in saying that don’t come back at me and say the parents should be right there. Because again kids slip away fast. Parents are there wrestling their child from the jaws of an alligator. Parents go pee for like 5 seconds and their kid slips out of the house, or climbs up something. These are not parents who are off smoking up and drinking their life away. These are parents trying to do their best at raising these little humans.

Stop judging. Stop throwing horrible words around at parents who are grieving and realizing that their baby, their child, that piece of their heart will never hug them again, will never kiss them, will never yell “mom, mom, mom” over and over again. Parents who will have to relive those terrible moments every second of every day.

Just stop.

Just say sorry! End. Stop. Nothing more.

After reading the New York Post article by Anna Davies I was a little ragey. Maybe it was because I had not drank my coffee yet. But most likely it was because the article started off like this,
“Meghann Foye, 38, was jealous of co-workers clocking out for maternity leave, and decided she needed a break of her own. Here, the author of the novel “Meternity” (Mira, out now), tells The Post’s Anna Davies why she believes every woman deserves mandated “me time.” ”

Umm since when did taking care of kids 24/7 equal a break or me time??
I’m lucky to drink half a cup of hot coffee a day…as in it takes me all day just to try and drink that one cold cup of coffee.

Oh look here is me taking quality me time.
I just spent a quality 30 minutes of me time scrubbing toothpaste off the bathroom floor and trying to get the Pull-up smell out of the girls bathroom.

I could market this!!!
“Come spend quality YOU time at my house. Pretend you are on maternity leave by scrubbing my smelly kids bathroom.
Will provide as much lukewarm coffee as required, and when you need a pee break I will yell your name outside of the bathroom and stick my hand under the door for the full effect.
You will feel refreshed and ready to take on the world”

Wait her quotes get better and better.

“It seemed that parenthood was the only path that provided a modicum of flexibility. There’s something about saying “I need to go pick up my child” as a reason to leave the office on time that has far more gravitas than, say, “My best friend just got ghosted by her OkCupid date and needs a margarita” — but both sides are valid.”

All that flexibility. I mean I travel the world at the drop of a hat with my four kids. I mean it is so easy to just drop everything and jet off to a sunny spot and not have to worry about life.
Heck I can’t even leave the house without changing two diapers, making sure two kids have peed in the toilet, checking that the diaper bag has diapers and spare clothes, that there are snacks and drinks because kids die if they don’t have those apparently. And by the time everyone has coats and shoes on you can smell a dirty diaper, or better yet they tell you that they need to pee half way through the grocery store when your cart is full.

Yes Meghann that’s right picking up your kids from daycare, strapping their germ infested bodies into a car seat, taking them home, making supper, watching your child refuse said supper because they don’t like it, bathing the squirming child, trying to shove pjs onto said child, reading stories, putting child to bed, putting child to bed again, and again…and again. And then getting up with child during the night, and then waking up at 5am to a kid screaming at you because they are hungry and then you get to start your day all over again. That is totally the same as going out for drinks with your sad friend.

Not to mention that if I as a parent decide that today is just not my day and I would prefer to leave child at daycare that’s cool because that’s not abandonment or anything. If you ditch your friend she won’t be taken away from you.

Maternity leave has zero me time. The only thing you rediscover about yourself while on Mat leave is your caveman smell when you have not showered in days. According to Meghann women suck at putting ourselves first. True but when you have kids that doesn’t change because all you are doing is now putting your kids first.

“Bottom line: Women are bad at putting ourselves first. But when you have a child, you learn how to self-advocate to put the needs of your family first. ” Meghann Foye

Fine take a break Meghann. It’s called vacation. But don’t compare it to maternity leave. Changing diapers and keeping another human alive is not the same as finding yourself.

In those parenting classes they never tell you that you will have days that you don’t like your kids. They teach you to breath through contractions and how to give a bath to a squirmy newborn. But they don’t teach you how to breath through your child throwing an epic hormonal fit that makes you look into boarding schools.

Those baby classes tell you how to push your baby out but they always fail to mention that the nurses will say push like you are pooping. And then later when your kids are bigger no one tells you that pushing like you are pooping will be the easiest part of parenting.

There will be days when you wonder what you have gotten yourself into and start to day dream about an island where all you can do is eat a snack out in the open while watching hours of Netflix. You will think about how you could wake up refreshed and bushy tailed each morning and drink a hot cup of coffee (not that you need the caffeine because you get a full 12 hours of sleep each night).

No one tells you that some days parenting sucks. That there will be tears, and yelling. The days where all ears are broken and no one seems to be able to listen. That you will keep your word and pack up their toys and hid them away. No one tells you these things because if they did the human race wouldn’t last long.

You see there are the good day. The days where a kid wakes up dry, and there are hugs and kisses. Days that kids play nicely together and you do all the perfect Pinterest parent things.

It’s easy to talk about those days. People don’t judge you on those days. They praise you and comment on what great parents you are.

No one wants to talk about the days that it seems like no one likes each other. The days where you just want to hide away in the bathtub eating cake.

No one tells you that parenting sucks some days